Bah! Humbug!!

We were shopping in a major big box store the other day and I saw what I thought were some pretty Christmas ornaments.  Turned out they were round Coca Cola and Sprite bottles.  On each of them was the greeting: "Happy Holidays".  Humph.  Not going to buy any of that product.

As we were  checking out, the checker, wearing a cute little red hat with a white cotton ball on top, said "Happy Holidays".  I said "Why don't you say "Merry Christmas?"  To which she replied, more than a bit unhappy, "Because they won't let us.  We can only say "Happy Holidays."

  Humph. We should boycott them.

The next day, the above card arrived in the mail.  It was from the president of Eastern Oregon University (formerly EOSC).  I can remember when the totally impersonal messages from former presidents (I worked under 7 different ones) would say "Merry Christmas."  As far as I could tell, no one, students or faculty, was ever upset about that. 

Humph.  Not going to send any financial support their way.

Looked at all the specials in the newspaper.  Not one ad mentions "Christmas."

 Cancel my subscription.

We went looking for Christmas cards.  Almost impossible to find anything but "Season's Greetings" or "Happy Holidays" on any of the cards this year.  (You have to dig deep, or down on the lower shelves.)

Humph.  Think I'll start creating my own Christmas cards.

I got to thinking about the whole silly politically-correct trend and have concluded that those behind it are a bunch of hypocrites  If they weren't  they would take it all the way. 

Think of the possibilities.  No more "Christmas" music.  Instead, we would have music such as:

"I'll Be Home for Holiday"

"It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like Holiday"

"Have Yourself a Merry Little Holiday"

"I'm dreaming of a white Holiday, with every holiday card I write..."

"I heard the bells on Holiday ..."

Television could only show re-edited movies such as

"A Holiday Carol" (1938, 1951,2009)

"Holiday Eve" (1947)

"Holiday Holiday" (1944)

Holiday in Connecticut" (1945)

"Holiday in July" (1940)

"A Holiday Story" (1983)

"A Holiday Tale" (20080

"The Holiday That Almost Wasn't" (1966)

"The Holiday  Tree" (1969)

"Holiday With the Kranks" (2004)

"Four Holidays"" (2008)

"A Holiday Story" (1983

                                                    "How the Grinch Stole Holiday" (2001)

"The Nightmare Before Holiday" (1993)

"Surviving Holiday" (2009)

"National Lampoons Holiday Vacation" (1989)

"Holiday in Wonderland" (2007)

and, of course, the perennial favorite --

Bing Crosby and Danny Kaye in

"White Holiday" (1954)

I see there's a stage version of that last one,

 so the same rule must apply to any stage adaptations of any of these movies. 

Then there are all those books in public libraries all over the country with that politically-incorrect word as part of the title.  Burn all those books.

I look out our condo windows and see the Farnsworth Farm has a big roadside sign that is going to have to be changed to "Holiday Trees For Sale".  Can't be the only sign like that in the valley, or the state, or the nation.  Why aren't they doing something about that?  File a suite.

After all, anything worth doing is worth doing well.

Meanwhile, you have only 14 shopping days 'till Holiday.